What wound did ever heal but by degrees?

Bored, bored, bored. Resting because I’m all raced out is tiring and tiresome. Recurring calf and hamstring niggles over the summer and autumn led me to the decision that I’d only do light training and no racing between the Abbey Dash and the Chevin Chase. Trouble is the Abbey Dash went really well. Spurred on by Abi I managed to equal my 10k PB of 40:36 and started to question the need to take a rest. Fortunately, none of the races over the next four weeks have any particular appeal for me so the temptation to just carry on isn’t as bad as it might have been.

I tried to get my racing fix at the end of last week by booking into future races; Thirsk 10 & Stockport 10 for Liz and Dewsbury 10k & Liversedge Half for the both of us. Booking online is dreadful. Almost as tiring as running the blooming races. Why don’t they have a button that allows you to pay for two people together rather then going through the whole thing twice? Why can’t the darned thing remember my details like it’s supposed to?

I’ve had a couple of reasonably long walks over the Chevin during the week but no training. I chugged around in the snow on Saturday morning for a respectable parkrun time of 21:49. I even warmed down and offered my aching legs up to Ned for an excellent post run Sports Fix massage.

I’m doing what I can to arrive at the start of marathon training in as good a condition as I can. Stretching at home, working on upper body at the gym and not putting the calves and hamstrings under any strain. I’m fiddling with my marathon training plan and trying not to look forward to the Chevin Chase too much.

Still bored.

For you and I are past our dancing days

It was the last of the Yorkshire Veterans’ Athletics Association Grand Prix series on Sunday and I turned up to run with the other has beens. Actually, you don’t have to be that old to be classed a “veteran” in the athletics world – 35. Must seem pretty ancient when you’re young, but most of the runners in this series don’t look like veterans to me.

I hadn’t really expected to run having tweaked a calf on the previous Sundays’ PECO cross country. I didn’t run at all in the week that followed but set off tentatively for the Saturday parkrun and found no pain at all. I was in full winter gear having expected to go slowly so had to hastily remove gloves and rain jacket when I found I was moving freely. I picked up the pace and provided a thorough test for the legs by the end. Managed just over 21 minutes from a pedestrian start, so was pleased with that.

I’d enjoyed the PECO race, but didn’t really consider it to be cross country. This was more like it though; squelchy mud, gates, stiles and narrow tracks. We started by running one and a half laps round an athletics track and even I’ve learned that this means that the organisers want to get the field spread out because there are some narrow bits coming up. I headed off as fast as I could and arrived at the first bottle neck reasonably far up the field. Not so far that I was killing myself to keep up, but I wasn’t frustrated by being held up either.

For the second race in a row, I settled in behind Mick from Eccleshill but it was pretty clear that this wasn’t the Mick of last week. No longer the mild mannered gentleman he’d turned into ….. The Hoganator. When he took off and dodged past other runners I held my ground as his pace was too hot for me. I maintained a steady trot and only had one brief moment of anxiety; after twenty five minutes the faster runners came bombing back towards me and I had a horrible thought that maybe it was an out and back and the race was further than I’d thought. Perhaps I should have looked at the map in registration. Turned out to be just over five miles and I came in about 50th in 38:33.

Was I first lady home? Nah. I’d bumped into Karen Pickles before the race so all bets were off. If I can get within a minute a mile of her then that’s the measure of whether I’ve done ok. Came in one place ahead of Marisol though so things are looking up.

'Twas pitiful, 'twas wondrous pitiful

My usual way of finishing a race is wheezing and spluttering and looking close to death. I surpassed myself at the first cross country of the season by adding a ludicrous limp and a pathetic keening noise.

It’s been mixed running fortunes since last I blogged. Apart from a couple of desultory training runs I’ve completed two races. I think that because I have no real concept of pacing and I’m a slacker I tend to look for someone else to take me round at a good clip. Consequently, since starting to run in2008 I’ve identified likely pacemakers and tried to hang onto them in a shamelessly parasitic fashion. Unfortunately, since twanging my hamstring at the end of June the usual suspects have been too quick for me so I’ve just run as fast as I think I can without risking injury.

I’d been feeling pretty chipper of late so decided that for Guy Fawkes 10 I’d aim for 1:15 and try to trail round after Marisol. In the six races we’d both run in prior to “the twang”, I’d finished ahead of her; in the six races we’d both run afterwards, she’d finished ahead of me. Keeping up with her would be an indication that I’m getting over the injury (she’s very consistent).

I overtook her after a couple of miles and the body seemed to be in decent shape. The first hill was horrible; I had to walk the second half and Marisol went past me just before the summit. I got my breath back at the top and went past her. Same story on the second hill, only I couldn’t get past her, just had to dig in and follow. At the third hill I decided not to walk and was just congratulating myself on a noble effort when a bend in the road revealed we were only halfway up the hill. I walked the second half. She got away from me and though I made up some ground, she finished 17 seconds ahead. This was a good result. She’d whupped me by ten minutes at the Bradford half so I was happy with my Ripley run.

There’ll be pressure on at the PECOs this year. Last year we unwisely got promoted and we’re in danger of being the West Bromwich Albion of the PECO league. At the first PECO at Pontefract I decided I had to go as fast as possible as we’ll need all the points we can get. The only tactic I can think of is to chase Russ round. Last year I’d mostly followed Deadly Hedley; by “followed” I mean start just behind him and then watch the gap gradually widen as the race unfolded. He was usually about a minute ahead of me at the end. This worked well last year apart from the race where I lost him at the start. I panicked and desperately went faster and faster trying to catch him up only to be overtaken by him after three miles. The last two miles were a nightmare as a procession of other runners went charging past me as I gasped and wheezed my way to the finish.

At Pontefract Russ set off with Abi and I tucked in behind them. I’d rejected the option of using Abi as a pacemaker as he’s too ……. flighty. When he overtook me at Bradford at mile seven he was running backwards and still finished seven minutes ahead of me. Russ made steady progress in the first couple of miles, regularly passing other runners and I was struggling to keep up. When he went past the familiar figure of Mick from Eccleshill I decided enough was enough and changed horses mid-stream. I swung in behind Mick with the intention of staying there as long as possible. This turned out to be until the top of the last slope about 500 yards from the finish. I was just considering revealing my amazing kick and sprint finish (so far this is just a concept, but one day it may happen) when my calf tightened and I watched him race off. Five other runners overtook me as I hobbled my way to the line in a comedy Long John Silver fashion. My fellow club runners were waiting at the end to cheer me in (there seems to be more of them finishing ahead of me than there used to be) and I must have looked a pitiful sight as I limped over the finishing line.

Bugger. Just recovered from the hamstring and now the calf starts to s play up. On the whole, this isn’t a major concern as the calf has tightened a couple of times a year for the last three or four years. Rest it for a week or so and submit to brutal torture from Tony’s healing hands and I’ll be back in business.

So, Pontefract was a race of mixed fortunes, but on the whole a success. Granted, the finish was pathetic, I picked up an injury and was unable to train for the following week. On the positive side I was closer to Mick than I’ve been in ages and I was first lady home (i.e. none of the ladies finished ahead of me, another measure of whether I’m on form).

I have bought Golden opinions from all sorts of people.

What on earth is happening at Runners World? At the moment, I’m running races but not training so decided to get my running fix through reading. We used to subscribe to Runners World but cancelled because we decided that there was nothing really new, just a re-hash of articles we’d already read. About three weeks ago a running friend told us there was an excellent article on Race The Train, a race that we’d run in the summer so off I trotted to pick up the November issue. Why do magazines do that? Publish the November issue in the first week in October? It’s not just Runners World, they all do it; I just can’t understand why you would publish a magazine three to four weeks before it is supposed to be due to be released, anyway, back to “What’s happening at Runners World”? If they cram anymore words on the front cover they won’t have space for the photo of the barely dressed model. Have they muddled up their priorities? They’ve cut her down to size and squeezed her in between a plethora of empty slogans.

There are thirteen separate messages on the front cover telling the browser about some not-to-be-missed article inside. From a design, marketing and running perspective this is a shambles. Isn’t there anybody on their editorial team who can take a step back and say “We’ve gone too far, our front cover is bobbins”. The photo is too small to attract the pervs and the messages are too many and too unclear to appeal to runners who want to improve. They’re just SHOUTING at me with their meaningless headlines. The only purpose of this cover is to win a competition for a magazine that can cram thirteen meaningless slogans and a pervy photo onto one cover; I don’t think such a competition exists.

What the f*** does “Think Your Way To A New PB” mean anyway? Why have they misused capital letters in this way? The article barely fills a page, has unforgivable typos and could have been written by a four year old. It does not provide me with the tools to improve performance. There is absolutely no science in this article, not even “bad science”. You could not accuse the authors of being charlatans as they don’t make exaggerated claims, it’s just filler.

“Beginners Run Off Road”, is just the same. Fewer then 500 words on running trail races. There are so many brilliant, inspiring, horrible, frightening trail races that you could easily fill a couple of pages with anecdotes and advice, but this article is just bland and instantly forgettable.

And on it goes. If I was an advertiser, I’d be really disappointed that the journalism and editorial professionalism was so poor. The quality of the advertising copy far exceeds that of the content of this magazine. I don’t have an axe to grind; I would genuinely like to read articles that are inspiring, thought–provoking and inspirational. The closest Runners World gets in this issue are the articles by Paul Groves on re-running his school cross country race and the Race The Train article by Warren Pole.

As ever, the “Rave Run”, where a reader describes their favourite run is hugely disappointing. There’s a brilliant photo and a story that demands at least a thousand words but it’s crammed into a two page spread. The photography on this article is consistently superb and the chosen subject invariably has a story to tell that is worth reading. But the article does not tell that story. Even when they have stumbled onto a winning formula, the editors manage to screw it up.

That said, they’re better than the opposition. Come on; feed me! There’s a readership out there that wants good quality journalism and the current offerings don’t meet that need.

O villain, villain, smiling, damned villain!

As I registered for my race on Sunday I bumped into a vastly experienced local runner who trots along at around the same pace as me. “What’s this one like”? I asked. “Not sure” he replied, “they all blend into one after a while”. This was a little puzzling as he has previously demonstrated encyclopaedic knowledge of almost every race I’ve turned up to. I thought no more of it and took up a position towards the back of the field as I was feeling some way short of my best. After all, in a seven mile race I could always go past people if I was feeling strong. Wrong! In this particular race the tactic is to get as close to the front of the field as you can and leg it as soon as the starter shouts “Go”! If you can then run like the clappers for the first half mile you’re almost guaranteed a victory over your rivals.

There were almost no opportunities for safe overtaking in the next five and a half miles and runners got bunched up as slower runners became slow-moving road blocks. With a record entry of over 400 those of us in the middle and towards the end of the field were stopping and starting and reduced to a walk as we climbed the first two miles.

When we eventually got onto the moor, it was no blessed relief; the organisers had forgotten to tell us that they’d borrowed Grimpen Mire for the morning for us to slog across. I will long remember the sight of two mud-splattered runners desperately tugging to release a fellow runner from a particularly foul smelling part of the bog. She’d wandered ever so slightly off path and was up to her waist in gloopy, black ooze. Once it was clear that she was no longer in danger, the whole incident cheered me up no end. I’d been slipping and sliding all over the place and had decided I was the most unfortunate and unstable runner on the moor. Three runners effortlessly overtaken and all three of them considerably dirtier than me. Result.

After some break-neck downhill sections we were faced with a short spot of rock climbing (from memory, I would grade it as Mild Very Severe) before a short stretch of track where overtaking was possible. I managed to get past a few runners in the final mile, but I didn’t have anything left by the end.

Whilst gasping for breath like a beached John Dory, my colleague from earlier (looking rested and refreshed) cheerily asked “What kept you”? From now on I think I’ll set off as close to the front as I can get away with at all trail, cross-country and fell races.

We have seen better days

In the spirit of the times I’m undertaking a Comprehensive Running Review over the full term of my two London marathon runs, past and future. Recent results show there is a record deficit between my actual race times and the performances required to bring me home at London Marathon 2011 in my target time of 3 hours and 15 minutes.

The review will be guided by the principles of freedom, fairness and responsibility. It will include my coalition partner Liz and will be a clear indication that we’re in this together. This wide ranging review will consider deficiencies of the previous administration – overeating, undertraining, running when injured etc) as well as providing a blueprint for future behaviour.

Deficit
5k deficit between best and current 1 minute and 30 seconds
10k deficit between best and current 5 minutes
10 miles deficit between best and currnet 10 minutes
Half Marathon deficit between best and current 15 minutes
Marathon deficit between best and current estimate 30 minutes
Chart 1A

Chart 1A shows a widening gap between current performances and times for races in late 2009/early 2010. As I was way off target at VLM 2010, I need to find about 45 minutes from where I am now to where I want to be in April 2011.

Tackling a deficit of this scale requires urgent action. The reason for the downturn in my running fortunes is, I believe, injury based. For the next six weeks I will not attempt to train when injured (I’ll still be racing, obviously, as I’m committed to protecting frontline activities). This will be the first step on a long road towards restoring good management of the running body. Mileage will be reduced in real terms with the intention to limit as far as possible the impact of running on the most vulnerable parts of my body (dodgy hamstring).

I won’t be able to achieve a step change in performance until I have fully rested the hamstring. From Abbey Dash until Chevin Chase I will be just jogging at selected events – namely the Saturday parkruns and the second PECO cross country race. This should provide me with a platform to consider new and radical approaches to increasing mileage in the New Year. From then, the bulk of the deficit reduction will be achieved through increased, focused training combined with improvements in healthy eating and in stringent portion control.

Christmas and the New Year will be particularly challenging with some tightening of belts as we fight inflation. In the New Year we will need to put austerity measures in place but I’m viewing this one week period as a winter recess.

The support of Liz will be vital to build our collective understanding of the issues, ensuring support for the overall principles and approach and discussing cross-cutting issues. We will need to work holistically together across traditional boundaries. We’ll test and challenge our plans and ensure that they respond to external engagement. These deliberations will be informed and supplemented by detailed conversations with our marathon running coalition colleagues.

I remain confident that we can build the foundations for strong and sustained growth. It will be a hard road that will lead to a better future.

Target Event Date
5k Target of 00:18:59 at Lancaster in summer 2011
10k Target of 00:39:59 at Dewsbury in Feb 2011
Half Marathon Target of 01:27:00 at Brass Monkey in Jan 2011
Marathon Target of 03:14:59 at London on 17th April 2011
Chart 1B

Chart 1B shows my PB target races for 2011. By undertaking a programme of key reforms I believe I can deliver this vision.

I can confirm that our plans have not been audited by the OBR (Office for Blogging Responsibility).

Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.

Anyone got a winning marathon training programme? Not one to make me win because frankly I don’t think that’s going to happen. Perhaps if I’d been born in the Rift Valley in 1986 with a modicum of running talent and a “can do” approach I might be in with a shout. Being born in Skipton in 1956 with no sporting prowess and a penchant for feeble excuses it would be a big ask to come home first in VLM 2011. I strongly suspect that I won’t even get an invite to the elite start. No, a training programme to enable me to give it my best shot is all I want.

Being a slacker, I thought I’d just filch someone else’s programme and adapt it ever so slightly. Where better to start than the VLM mag? They’ve got three in there aimed at different abilities. I’m flummoxed. They’re 13 week programmes, but which 13 weeks? There’s no taper built in. Is tapering old hat? I liked tapering last year as I was absolutely knackered and couldn’t possibly have just gone from full bore training to running the race. Am I supposed to invent my own taper programme and add that on at the end? Two weeks? Three weeks? What?

On to Runners World website then. They’ve got three, but there’s a problem; I want the target time promised by the Advanced programme (sub 3:30), but I’m only prepared to put in the effort of the Intermediate programme (5 days, 32 to 48 miles). I’ll mix and match. Excellent. It’s a sixteen week programme that takes us nicely from Boxing Day to Race Day.

Now add in all the races that I want to run. Blimey, there are loads of them. Three club cross country races that I don’t want to miss. I want to run some twenty milers and Trimpell and East Hull appeal. From the experience of last year, running in proper races is a good way to get in a long run; it’s pretty dull doing a solo run. I could do with race organisers firming up on dates, especially Dewsbury 10k as that will be one of my four “A” races for 2011. Baildon Boundary Way a week before VLM – is that pushing it with an off-road half? Sod it, I’ll give it a go if I can get in. I’ll have to try and do something creative with the Saturday morning parkruns though. Anyone got any bright ideas for how I can make them a useful part of marathon training?

I feel better now tackling the marathon with a proper plan. I won’t stick to it of course. Probably be backsliding after the first week. Planning and blogging are going well; if I keep this up I might manage to avoid doing any running at all.