Sunday, 27 March 2011

An improbable fiction


I’ve had a busy morning; not only did I run a 10 mile race, but while running it I may well have stumbled on key information that will clear up a mystery that has baffled the authorities and the British public since 30th December 1993. At around mile three and a half I made an unconfirmed sighting of Archie Brooks who many people think died in the Beckindale Air Disaster of that date. Of course his body was never recovered and ever since there has been feverish speculation as to what happened to Emmerdale Farm’s only worthwhile character (sorry Tony, but it’s true). The bugger came loping past me bold as brass. I didn’t have the oomph to set off after him and confront him with the evidence as I’d started a bit too quick and had just climbed the only significant gradient on the run. Perhaps others on the run saw him and can confirm my sighting?

One of the side effects of running at various speeds slower than normal is that I no longer recognise the group of people that run at the same pace as me. This is a handicap as with no specific time to go for I like to just join in at the appropriate pace set by familiar runners. I’d decided that a 70 minute run would be OK, but I’d like to go a wee bit faster. The only way I’m going to achieve this is to either run with someone or race against someone.

I’d bumped into Mick before the start and the 65 minutes he was aiming for was going to be too quick for me so I tucked in behind him on the starting line and thought if I kept him in sight then he’d gradually pull away and I’d get round in a good time. Within the first couple of hundred yards that plan is scuppered as he’s away and I’m involved in a mad scramble with a large group. I run the first two miles at 65 minute pace and Mick is so far ahead I can’t see him. A little way ahead of me is a guy with a pony tail who I’m fairly certain finishes races at about the same time as me. He looks at his watch at two miles and picks the pace up. I slow my pace down and settle in behind Liz Wood who stormed past me in the closing stages at Trimpell. James sidles up alongside me; he’s also aiming for 65 minutes but with a negative split. He’s soon away and I spot Frank a couple of hundred yards up ahead and decide to let Liz Wood take me forward, but it’s not working. Frank is just as far ahead at mile 4 as he was the previous mile. I pick up the pace and find myself behind Leopard-Skin-Bra Lady. Go through mile five in 33:30 and we’ve caught up to Pony Tail Boy but we’re no nearer Frank. I push on again and go past him just after mile six. I’ve nobody familiar to run against now, but it’s OK as it’s one of those races where you run up the road as the faster runners run down it. This provides a great distraction looking out for people I know. I see everyone I know who’s in the race but somehow miss Archie Brooks; perhaps someone else has recognised him and he’s had to make a hasty exit.

The last two miles feel tough but are downhill. I’m dragged along by a couple of blokes from the same club who are racing each other and hanging onto them is a good distraction from thinking about how much the legs hurt.

A sharp left and a sprint for the finish and it’s job done in a chip time of 1:07:10.

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